|Author: Pastor Faith Oyedepo|
Today, I want to let you know that it is God’s desire for you to accept your marital responsibility. Responsibility is the price for greatness. Therefore, it is very important as a man or woman in marriage to accept responsibility. Nothing works on its own; you have to work out your marriage to make it a fulfilled one.
Your primary responsibility is to love, care for and generally oversee the welfare of your family. A great burden is placed on the man to love his wife as Christ loves the Church, and he is not exempted from this responsibility, even if his wife is not submissive or unsaved. This responsibility can be accomplished only through sacrifices, being a godly example and through an unconditional devotion, commitment and dedication to his marriage.
It is very important for you to know that your wife is your chief concern, second only to God. As a man, you are the head of the household and you bear the responsibility for the entire family unit. Your leadership position as head of the union places a great responsibility on you to protect, care for and seek the general well-being of your family spiritually, physically and emotionally. This must be seen in action and not in mere words. You can tell your wife all day long that you love her, but until you show her that love, your words will do little to strengthen your relationship.
As a husband, you need to encourage the spiritual development of your family, as Christ encouraged the spiritual development of His disciples. You must be prepared to lay down your life for your wife and every member of your family if necessary. This includes giving up selfish hobbies and past times which take you away from family unit or drain needed resources from the family budget. For the spiritual development of the family, it is also required that as a husband, you lead your household in the study of God’s Word and in regular family devotions. You are to take the lead particularly by example, in the worship of God. In addition, you cannot direct the affairs of your family without first having daily fellowship with the Lord in prayers and the study of the Bible.
Another fundamental responsibility of the husband is to honour his wife (1 Peter 3:7). This, perhaps, is even a higher level of responsibility than just providing for her physical needs. Respect, they say, is reciprocal. If a man must enjoy respect from his wife, then he must be willing to first invest in it. He must respect, admire, appreciate, praise and exalt her.
The woman’s primary responsibility, after the Lord, is to her husband and her children. The woman received the title of “help meet” in Genesis 2, which clearly established her role in the family as one of a support to her husband. The Bible specifically demands of the woman’s submission in all things. A man of wisdom, David Lipscomb, wrote, “The submission of the wife to the husband is that of love, respect and reverence, which is befitting the relation she holds to her husband. In her sphere, she is spiritually on equality with man, but as a husband, he is the natural scripturally recognised head and leader of the family. Her submission must be in accordance with the principles of righteousness, and nothing is more required of her in consistent with Christian character”.
The idea of submission is a stumbling block to many women, because they equate submission with inferiority. Men and women are created co-equal by God, but for the purpose of His plan of redemption, God has assigned to each of them differing roles to carry out. God has clearly called the wife to submit to her own husband. That is God’s design ordained for her blessings. The Word of God says: Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing (Ephesians 5:22-24).
The matter of submission is very clearly indicated in the above scripture. The wife is to submit to her husband; the manner of submission is as unto the Lord, and the motive is God’s design to make the husband the head of the wife.
Just as the body submits to the brain that is located in the head by design, so the wife should submit to the husband who is the head. When you see a body that does not respond to the head, you see a deformity, something that is not normal or a dysfunctional person. The same is true in a marriage. Where a wife does not submit to her husband, there is distortion, deformity and dysfunction. God has designed that the body respond to the head, and the husband is the head of the wife.
Furthermore, it is important t recognise that the power to fulfill your marital responsibility only comes from God. If you desire this power, you need to surrender your life to Christ, if you are not born again. You can say this prayer: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me of my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. Deliver me from sin and satan to serve the living God. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”
If you prayed this simple prayer, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).
Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through firstname.lastname@example.org; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).